Yes, I've heard it changed from Lampropeltis mexicana alterna (probably "phase blairi" as I understood from your explanation) into Lampropeltis alternata blairi. But I've never did great research towards it.

I think it's he. I know madame holds her tail up, but still I've not seen him attached to her. I've seen him try though, but never succeed. A well, we'll see, it's no must.